Yet untitled

These few days have been kind of edgy out here. Strikes, protests and curfews for some pseudo-political purpose I fail to really comprehend. Sometimes i wonder, what is it that we are striving to achieve... a little fame, a little power, a little more wealth? All at the cost of the very reasons that we want to achieve these for! It all reminds me of the little kid who jumped across the stream to be able to jump back to where he was. Then when he crossed it and was about to jump back home, he realised that the water had risen and he was left stranded.
I just found something i had scribbled on a piece of tissue paper...i don't even remember where and when i had written it but here it is...

...From the ancient dry nights to
deeper echoing nights I've crawled.
Shelter me in my flights,
bury me and then uncover a greater me from these nights.
Hither i blossom where petals guard me,
prickly walls, into the fresh air I've crawled.

I'm a stranger, a story untold, a vision unrealised,
a clock unwinding, a picture unfolding...
Just a soul trying to find a perch,
fingers searching for a ledge,
just another ordinary boy, growing up...can you see me now?

The road head calls while bridges behind fall,
from these nights I now awaken with a hopeful yawn...

and oh yes! guess who that little kid was?..yupp l'il old me.

Sometimes i feel like...

…Sometimes I feel like a milestone, pointing out destinations but myself always ‘on the road’.
…sometimes I feel like a lamp post, shedding light for all but itself hidden in the convenient dark.
…sometimes I feel like a shooting star, the brighter it flares the quicker it recedes.
…sometimes I feel like the sun, holding the solar system together but itself all alone.

…Sometimes I feel like a desert night, screaming and screeching but no one hears a word.
…sometimes I feel like a song, people take me into their own context so that no one knows what I really say.
…sometimes I feel like a crying wolf, and the world thinks I’m just howling at a naked full moon.
…sometimes I feel like a war, millions die and millions cry but no one’s really sure why I came.
…sometimes I feel like an atom-bomb dropped loose, defending or destroying, I don’t really know.
…sometimes I feel like the questions of a child, naïve or wisdom, no one’s really thought.

…Sometimes I feel we’re all just candles, fighting to burn before we’re finally blown out.
…Sometimes I feel like the ancient me…

Drop a comment and share your "sometimes i feel like..." and i will append it to the original post with credits to you.

Echoes of the precious visitors who dropped a comment ( Thanks to all :-) }:
Sometimes I feel like a sand castle that can be easily washed away by a gentle wave... {Manik}
Sometimes I feel like a slave, waiting for my emancipation... { ibutabu}

A Midnight down

Did i feel that i heard the cymbals and the chimes of a beautiful world unfolding before me?
Did i feel that the long awaited eternal togetherness was waiting just around this solitary corner?
Did i feel that the rearrangement of my priorities was so worth it?
Did i feel that being alone doesn't mean being lonely... 'coz the beauty i dig, resides within me, for me?
Did i hear the echo of a happy song after so long?
Did i trace the curve of a long awaited, almost forgotten smile? Did I...

Did i feel the whiff of a blooming rose?
Did i feel the joy of a smiling baby?
Did i feel the brush of a loving caress?
Did i feel the peace from the burial of a dark 'yesterday'...and did i feel the joy from the resurrection of a softer 'today'?
Did i feel the reason for a new beginning?
Did i feel the presence of a strength to start all over again?
Did i feel in love being loved?
Did i feel i was someone's beautiful world?
Did i finally feel like who i am is what i want to be? Did I...

Did i just feel like all of these feelings were just acrobats of an illusion...
Did i just feel like the ancient me...

What matters ...Not.

Thoughts locked in some solitary late hours of the night, they ramble from one loose end to another of a tangled up existence. I look around me , and all I hear is the shrill echo of silence that darkness brings along with her, the silence that always provides too many answers for a question. Noise irritates and disturbs you… but silence? It confuses a ‘thinking ear’. There are always these voices in and around your head… just like these eyes that hound you, from within and thither…some comforting, some brimming with wet malice. You look right into them and they disappear… till you can look no more, and they disappear no more…
When its days of nourishment, metamorphosis inside your private cocoon, watching down from a private hill with time perpetually corroding and eroding everything around you. You feel everyone and everything around you , but it fails to stimulate any impact on you.
Its kinda tough to realize that no one and nothing at all is indispensable, not even yourself… but I think I get it now. It makes you feel less important, strips you of your fancy bows and airs, confuses and hurts you a little to realize that life goes on… you go on… even if the people you love become non-existent; that life goes on… all the people you love will go on… even if you become non-existent. It traumatizes you a little to swallow the realization that- all that matters, really matters not much if it didn’t matter anymore. I wish it could all have been some other softer way, but it seems this is the way the world revolves.
…and while the curtains on the window glow from the growing radiance of a new day outside, where the final echoes of the screeching night trail in the silence of deserted streets, I wonder about the eternal strangeness of life… and wonder how it’ll continue to awe us all..

I Choose to Live - II

... continuation to 'I Choose to Live - I'.

Aaah… I know, you might think that it’s just the rush of a young mind and that time and age will calm me down! But consider this, how ‘old’ is ‘young’ and how ‘young’ is ‘not old’? Everything is relative here. And if you relate your age to the universe, too old is not old enough. Time, as we know is infinite and a lifespan is just a mere moment. So live it. Don’t just plan to live, always planning for ‘that tomorrow’ when you get ‘this’ done and get ‘that’ accomplished….Be living it, love to live…for the truth of our existence is encapsulated in the entirety of life, not in a few fleeting marked moments. By planning up ahead too much, don’t push the Beginning closer to the End, for the End with all its doubtless realities is already close enough! Realise this but don’t despair, as that will only push the beginning closer to the end, and hence, relatively, you bring the End closer, and like I already said… the End with all its doubtless realities is already close enough.
Just loosen your collar, tip back your fancy hats and look around… observe, absorb life; don’t just speak wisdom, reach out; don’t just think, contemplate; don’t only hear, listen… its all out HERE, not THERE or SOMEWHERE, its EVERYWHERE. There’s a whole life waiting for you to live, trembling… the casket of life! The first reach is the scariest… but that’s how they all felt, before the first step on the moon, before the first ice-axe picked on the pinnacle of Everest, before the first neutron bombarded the atom, before the first wild cry for freedom, before the revelation of the first vision, before the crackle of the first fire… yes! That’s how they all felt before the first cry of victory.
Choose Life! Hah! You laugh, and I spit… and no matter if some of you or all of you choose otherwise, I choose to live life as long as I'm alive… so God help me!!!

The Uprising

Around 1,700,000 people of Kashmir marched to the streets with banners and slogans protesting against the atrocities in Kashmir by the Indian government and demanding independence. A memorandum stating the same was submitted to the UNO office here a few days ago. This is not a post reporting about the event. It's just an echo so that you become aware of this voice. Google "kashmir independence" to get updated on the event.

I Choose to Live -I

Well now… I’ve been running after the trails of shooting stars, and as one burned out, there was another that flared up in the sky. Beauty so haunting…frantic, frenzied, scary chases. Oh yes! They went speeding by, leaving behind a granular sparking trail, never in the same direction, inciting all the 'wandering wonderers' to follow enchanted. So we never got far, though it was always farther. Along twisted trails, we blazed footprints, lost to memory and time.

Yes, we might have lost some pieces of ourselves along the way, but then the gatherings too we brought back with us. I don’t judge them to find out, I just conclude on this. It all adds a spark to kindle us on our journey now. I know it does for me, at least.
If “being out there and making it back” didn’t rejuvenate us in some way, we would feel like the white ashes, maybe a little pure, but cold and lifeless, and we would feel so dead. But no! This thumping palpitation in me thrives on adrenalin, on the natural thrill of a pure life…to live… and how to live… but we’ll live to the end! Yes… I’ll live till the end… till the night whistles tunes unheard to the living dead… till the fickle minded stars keep switching their colours from hazy purple to mellow red. Alas, unnoticed to some, who only stare ahead and find no reason to gaze around…simply gaze, for the sheer unreasonable beauty of admiration, to absorb, to wonder in awe. And then, to realize the shrinking of your own ego, feeling the stupendous power of the vast cosmic expanse, and through this, finding in some subtle way the relation of the self to the universe…so delicate yet so strong, so implicit and yet so true!... my relation to the universe… the relation of my relativities to the Absolute!

...to be continued as 'I Choose to Live-II'